Shut it off!!!

Seriously!

I wish I could just stop my thinking...

seriously...

I know I touched on this 2 posts ago, about me and my emotional "specialness," but you know, it's not even emotional "specialness" it's quite simply that  I care.

Women get stamped "EMOTIONAL" and men get stamped "EMOTIONLESS." Fine, women are emotional, we are more emotional than men, can it complicate things? Yes. But really, truly, in the end, we sort it out and figure it out... slowly but surely... it might take us going through a few failed relationships and fights and bs to learn a thing or two about the way a man works... and same for men, I'm sure it takes failed relationships and all that stuff too to learn how a woman works. I should also mention that men aren't emotionless, they have emotions too they just show it (or not show it) in different ways.

All in all... I don't think EITHER of us have it easy. Through my failed relationships, and learned lessons and talks with boys that are friends I think I'm close to getting a good grasp on the mind of a male. Now, I think there are many different types of males and ways they work, but in the end is there ONE word to describe them?

In this relationship that I'm in.. I don't know what to call it though, is it a relationshipless relationship? There have obviously been times when I let my emotions determine what I communicate, then a second, or hour, later the light bulb turns on and I'm like "...oohhh!!! I get it!!!!!!!" Why can't I just get it before I open my mouth ... errr let my thumbs do the texting! I need to stop thinking about things!

Anyways, back to different types of males.... actually.. all men are the same, some just talk and distract you, while others play it cool and just do their thing. So... I do know that mens' actions are their words... their actions speak for how they feel. I just happen to forget about that little but VERY IMPORTANT fact.  oh gosh... I'm confusing myself.. because while mens' actions speak for how they feel ... I guess I should say that some of their actions speak for how they feel.

Example: Mr.  High School comes over a lot and spends the night on weeknights and has to leave my place at 530am to get to work on time. He's sacrificing a lot to do that... he's sacrificing a good nights sleep to be in top form for his job and it's important for him to be alert, but it's not only his job that needs his body and mind to be in top form, he needs it too. So I get he sacrifices a lot to spend time with me and I appreciate it so much. But of course today I freaked out a bit in my head when he asked to put a stop on sleep overs until my school ends (which is in like 3 weeks.. or maybe 2? I don't remember), then we can have Friday nights together. I asked if we were okay, and he said we were... AND WE ARE!!!!!! After I asked him that I realized that, whatever, I took it personally and I let my insane head do all this running around for no reason. If only I could put a stop to it. So this is a prime example of his actions showing how he feels.... and of how I can be emotionally special...

Men are simple, bottom line... they eat, drink, piss, shit, sleep, do things for us and love us. Women are simple in a complicated way we love too much, we care too much, we over analyze too much.... and we eat, drink, piss,  shit and sleep too.  (I'd like to take this moment and remind men how important it is to remember that we piss and shit too :) ).

I was talking to a friend of mine and we were talking about the difference between men and women and I accepted the fact that we are emotional.. not emotional... yes emotional but I just feel that it has such a negative connotation!... we are caring :)  He was saying that bottom line is that men really only think with their cocks... which is interesting because that's a thought I held on to for the longest time... which made it hard for me to really trust what came out of a boys mouth... and with this relationshipless relationship I'm getting rid of that mentality... maybe it'll kick me in the butt later on maybe it wont... I gotta learn to give every guy a fair chance..... until they screw me over and then I say to myself "see I was right, he only thought with his cock."

I must say though, while I get that mens' actions speak their feelings, it's nice to hear how they feel sometimes. Just to support that what we think their actions are saying are right.. if that makes sense... or is that me being too much in my head again? hahaha .... anyways!! Actions=Feelings!!! Actions= Feelings!!! All together now!!! Actions=Feelings!!

Is any of this making sense?!?! How can something so simple, like 2 human beings joining together, turn into something complicated.... I guess it just doesn't have to be... and I guess that's where I need to draw the line....... it's just so hard not to think!

...thoughts?

 :)



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