Make-out sesh!

Alright ya'll! 

To my avid readers, if you've paid attention I'm pretty sure I've mentioned several times about how much I love love love kissing and make-out sessions!  Seriously, they're the fuckin' best!! Yes, it requires foul language because that's how serious and passionate I am about how much I love make-out sessions!

First and foremost, kissing is so important in a relationship, it just is... AND! It's also something that sort of sets the relationship up, I think it plays a big role in compatibility... maybe I'm stretching it by saying it plays a big role in compatibility, but for the most part it really sorta does. If two people have a horrible time kissing one another, they need to turn around and walk away...or run...whatever floats their boats.  I'm going to go ahead and discredit first kisses on that one... well... maybe not... First kisses can be amazing (check out my post on some of my amazing first kisses), some can be "eh, not amazing but there's potential", and then some can be horrible in which the 2 people need to run or walk away. First kisses can be really stressful so that's why some of them slide from this rule.

There's a kiss that comes to mind that was really bad, actually 2 come to mind and they both shared the same quality.... well not quality (they weren't "grand" or anything like that), characteristic, they both shared the same characteristic.... one I'd like to call Dagger Tongue.... your tongue is not a weapon... no need to stab away at my tongue with that thing... sheesh!! Enough said.... those instances there was no connection and I politely said "no thank you" and walked away :)

Anyways! I went off on a little tangent! So if there's no chemistry in a kiss, then I kinda really do believe that there is no compatibility. Yeah both parties could take time to learn to be on the same kissing level, but really? Who would want to waste their time trying to enjoy kissing someone when they can just continue looking for the one who's tongue fancies theirs and vice versa.

So, there really is a major point to this post! Make-out sessions are hot.... hot make-out sessions truly make my day, probably even my week... yeah, my week too. There is so much raw, hot, sexual desire that's just being released by tongue on tongue action, bodies held tightly to one another, biting and sucking on lips and tongues RAWR!!! Ugh!!! I LOVE it!  Which leads me to my major point!

While I love sex and enjoy it greatly, as so many of you out there do too, I feel that once sex gets involved those hot make-out sessions no longer hold all that power... it kinda dies. Kissing turns into little pecks or something that's an intro to sex. It's never just a back-in-the-day hot make-out session!
I mean shit, I'm a hypocrite when I say that I wish we could isolate make-out sessions from sex. I know how I work, and once sex in a relationship has been had, its hard NOT to let a hot make-out session lead to it. 

One of the great things about super hot make-out sessions without sex after, is that it keeps you wanting more more more! It keeps that energy going, that flame burning longer! Which I think probably is a super healthy way to keep sexual desire up! Maybe that's a reason why passion tends to die out for some people in their relationships?

So, in conclusion, I have a proposition to ya'll out there in monogamous, sexual relationships. Try and isolate make-out sessions, and maybe do it when you know you don't have time to do the nasty. Maybe in the morning before heading out the door to work. Mmmmm just think about it!!! 

This happened to me the other day, I had a super hot make-out session! The next day at work all I thought about was that make-out session.... it was so completely distracting and frustrating, but you bet your ass I can't wait to see that boy again so I can pounce his ass :)

So for those of you with your significant others, have a hot make-out session before going to work so you'll be thinking about each other all day so that when you get home from that long tiring day, there's no way you wont make time for some sweeeet lovin'!


POWER TO HOT MAKE-OUT SESSIONS!!!

<3

Smooch

Yup! Smoochie poo!!! How many epic, movie-like first kisses have you had?!?! Lying in bed this morning I began to think about my memorable first kisses and some of them were so movie-like that I figured I should share them! How exciting!! I get to re-live them! I can't wait!

First kisses are such a defining fuckin moment for us all. They are either what we hoped or expected them to be, horrible and disgusting thus ending the infatuation, or far exceeds anything you could ever imagine!!! First kisses are, what I kind of think, the very first thing that gets the ball rolling... or not. We all have thousands of crushes all over the place, and when and if the feelings are mutual the first kiss is what really starts things off.

So, here are some of my memorable first kisses.... smooch!


French Kiss

My very first french kiss!!! Wait, my very first kiss with a boy!!! Ya'll remember Bert Williams from Nostalgia Part 1? Well, he was my very first kiss! First french kiss! If you did read that post I'm pretty sure you might remember the whole weird boob thing that went down but I don't think I really talked about actually kissing him! Well, I don't remember how it went down, it was probably in the movie theater, in fact I think it was. I vivdly remember the thoughts and feelings I had when our tongues touched. It was so weird!!! His tongue was a thick muscle, and grainy too. I just remember being schocked by the graininess of his tongue. I never imagined or knew what it would feel like, tongue touching tongue for the first time! It was almost alien like. But of course, I loved how it felt, not just how it felt in my mouth, but how my body felt when kissing. Gah! I love kissing! Thank you Bert Williams for being the first to introduce me into the wonderful world of making out! My tongue was probably like "SCORE!!! WE DID IT!!! WE MADE HEADWAY!!!!" First tongue action....check!


Peck

I might have mentioned this dude before in a past post... yes, my Closure post the boy that I imagined growing old with. Well my first kiss wasn't epic epic but it was really cute and sweet and really holds a nice picture in my head of what young love once was. So this dude, I met him online when I was like a junior or senior in High School. Anyways, my senior year of High School or the summer before or after, I can't remember, there was the Warped Tour going on. This dude lived in the NYC area and I lived in the Philadelphia area (and we still do :) ). Anyways we decided to meet at the Warped Tour in NYC that summer. I asked two of my gals to join me and they did. We got to the Warped Tour, and I met up with him. Such a cutie! Anyways! So we spent some time together then drifted off separately with our friends. At the end before I left, I went to say goodbye to him. I had never been this bold before in my entire life (....17yrs at that time haha). I leaned in, and gave him a cute, quick peck on his lips. It wasn't anything grandiose or hot and heavy, but it was sweet and full of love. I can still remember the feeling of that smile on my face.



Forgetful

This first kiss was cute, memorable, and very movie-like! This was the ultimate "so the things that happen in romantic movies CAN happen in real life" event! This kiss was given to me by my first love, my first serious relationship, my first everything real and serious. It all started the summer after graduating High School. He was going through some stuff so he was hanging out with a close friend of mine so that summer he, 2 of my bffs and I spent the whole summer together. I got to liking him and he got to liking me :) Both of us were shy and didn't really make any moves. Then I moved 2 hrs away to go to college, but we still kept in touch. I came home to visit sometime in the winter and this is when the magic happened!!

It all started with a weekend full of hanging out together. One of my bffs kind of coaxed him into staying over my house one night, it was supposed to be a sleep over with all of us, but then she and her boy left last min! Awkwardness prevailed! The next day we spent the whole day togethter, we went out and had brunch, we made a snowman, and went sledding! The next day we went and visited my bff at college, and spent the whole day with her and her man. Then! The next day was the day! We went to the movies with a friend of mine, then he dropped her off and drove me home.

I know this is a long description of this first kiss, it was a major one! I had to give a background story. So! he dropped me off and I remember going inside and being upset at myself for not kissing him, not making the move! I was bitching to my mom about it about how I wanted to kiss him but didn't. Then I went up to my room and heard a car outside so I looked out the window, thinking it'd be my sister... but it wasn't... it was him! He was calling my name, and I responded with "yeah?" and he said "come outside" (btw, I had to consult my old journal ... I didn't remember ALL of this :) ) . So I go outside, and he says to me "I forgot to give you something" and in my head I knew it, I knew we were going to kiss! So I said "oh, really?" Then he kissed me!!! I remember thinking I sucked because I was so completely nervous! But this was like the best first kiss ever! The events that surrounded it, the innocence, purity and genuineness of it all. It was beautiful! It led to a wonderful 3 yr relationship. <3



Magical

There's this forest area in my neighborhood where I grew up, it is known as The Magic Forest. It's a place where teens go to do rebellious stuff, like do drugs, have sex and get away from the parents. My friends and I would go and do illegal bonfires, those were the best! Of course there was the occasional smoking pot or sex sessions ;) Anyways, this kiss.... this magical kiss. This too was also pulled out of a movie. When I lived in CA I would come back to the east coast to visit once in a while. This one particular time, this dude came to visit me for the weekend. I was sick as a dawg! Snotty and a hoarse voice! We decided to go to the magic forest for a nice bonfire. The season was the end of fall turning into winter. I brought my box of tissues and we brought some matches.

When you enter the magic forest its all trees, as it should be, but you follow this path to a nice clearing where bonfires are held. We got to the clearing, there were bottles and trash left behind from whoever visited it last. We found a good spot, I sat on a fallen tree trunk while he went and searched for wood for the fire. He gathered the wood and set it up nicely for good fire starting. He got the fire started and we just sat there and watched the fire. At first he sat far from me, then he came and sat right next to me. He put his arm around me to keep me warm. It was sweet. Then he leaned in and kissed me. It was a nice kiss. I know this part doesn't seem that magical, but wait for the rest!

So, I know that was the first initial kiss with him, but you know how sometimes the first kiss is like this event full of kisses. Anyways, we got up to walk around the clearing a bit. Then we stood at this one spot, and looked at the sun setting. He held me close to him and then it started to snow, little flurries. It truly was magical. Picture the setting, us watching the sunset and little snow flurries all around us. This was when he kissed me again. The most perfect kiss in the most perfect setting. So romantic, so simple, so beautiful. :)



Star Gazing

No, this doesn't involve star gazing. I was on my second date with this dude. He was 10 yrs older than me, and an aspiring actor (this was when I lived in LA.....go figure...). We went to the Griffith Observatory on this particular date. This was my first time at Griffith.... Griffith is now my favorite place in LA (not because of this kiss)! So from Griffith you can see all of LA! When the sun sets you get this beautiful view:

(not sure if this picture does any justice but it truly is breath taking when you're there in person)

Anyways!!! So this ledge that is in the picture we were standing right there watching the sunset over LA and that is where he kissed me. It was a nice kiss nothing major but nice and sweet. Like I said in my last kiss, sometimes the first kiss is like this event of kisses. So then after Griffith we went to dinner then drove back to his place where I had my car parked. He parked his car, we got out and stood at the back of his car to say our goodbyes. Then, the hottest make out session commenced. He kissed me goodbye, naturally, but we could not stop! We were interlocked and making out! It was hot! and it was heavy!! He pushed me up against his trunk and we were just into it, nothing else existed at that moment! He could not let go of me and I him. I miss make out sessions like those. It was just so intense and filled with passion and hot hot love! It was like our lips were made for each other! Sigh.... we dated for 3 months and that was it for me and actor boy.



Anyways! Those first kisses were the most memorable kisses I've had. It's a shame I can't really remember any of the others. Oh well! Maybe there's a reason for that! haha!!! Well, I hoped you enjoyed reading my memorable first kisses as much as I did reliving them :)

<3

Shift

So, I know I've written silly posts, serious posts, and posts that have helped me figure me out through this journey in singledom. Here I go, so, I see a therapist about once a week, it was one of my goals when I moved back to the east coast 6 months ago. The last visit with her I was sort of at a low point. Behind my silly posts and my posts where I seem strong and defiant and feeling A-OKAY about being a single woman, there is a sad desperate me. In all seriousness, jokes aside on this post...

I kind of hit a wall in my last session. I felt like I was just kidding myself in this whole process. I look at my exes who have moved on, are in new relationships, or even married and I look at myself and don't understand why I am always left being single. (Note: There is nothing wrong with being single. It's actually quite lovely! You can be as selfish as you'd like! Go where you want, do what you want etc.). It only makes me think "Is there something wrong with me?!!?!?" Of course when I asked this question I was semi-yelled at "NO!" But how can I help feeling this feeling of helplessness?

I went on to tell my therapist how much I hate how desperate I am. How I try to accept this being single, this not being on a path I thought I'd be on by now. Then she presented me with a question: "Well, Neomie, what is the difference between being desperate and having passion towards something?" I saw clearly what she was getting at, I get it, I know! I replied with "Well a desperate person has that want and need for this thing, but they want it so bad that it's sad and that they kind of end up feeling helpless....they have no confidence in getting what they want..." Passion?!?! Well, I thought that was an easy answer "Passion is when you also want something so bad, you have so much love for it but you have, you own that confidence in attaining that passion."

So, I guess the big question here now is, "where's the confidence?"

When we were all 18/19 most of us created some sort of plan for ourselves, even if we weren't serious about it, we still sort of hung onto it, it's still in us. We all set goals for ourselves- "Where will I be when I'm 30?" type of goals. Back then I thought life was a bitch but by the time I'd turn 30 I'd be with my future husband, have a stable career and start thinking about having babies and starting a family. I'm 27...30 is coming up around the bend.... and it doesn't look like I'm headed towards that dream/goal/plan I had. Yes, I still have that plan, but I just have to change that #....that age. There's a shift in my plans now, it's not as cookie cutter as I hoped it'd be. So, that's where my confidence went...my plan failed, so therefore... I have failed.

Shake that shit out of your system!!!!!!! Pronto!!! That, my friend, is where my desperation stems from.

It's not only bad that I feel this, but I also get it from my mother. Pushing my age and not having that jewish husband...oy!!!

Where do I go from here? How do I change the feeling of desperation into passion? How can I gain confidence?

Being/thinking/living positively rather than negatively? Just accepting this, giving in and let whatever happen, happen?

I've tried it all!! So, universe, I look up at you at night and you give me no answers. I've got nothing to work with.

On a more positive note. I love how I've challenged myself these past few months. If I wasn't single none of these milestones would've been accomplished. I have learned a lot about myself. I've learned how to start loving myself and all of that cheesy crap.

I'm completely open for love and from this day forward I will stop looking at it in desperation but with passion. When it's time, it's time...I just wish the time was now..haha!

Thanks for reading!

<3